There is a gap that shows up again and again in families who are thinking about succession. I learned the name for it recently, sitting in on a session with Dr Dennis Jaffe, one of the leading researchers in this field. He calls it the succession gap. Families intend to plan. They know it matters. And yet, when it comes to actually doing something about it, very few take the first step.
I found this both familiar and a little confronting. Familiar, because I have watched it play out in family after family over the years. Confronting, because it means good intentions are rarely enough on their own.
What struck me most, listening to Jaffe, was not the gap itself, but what sits underneath it. His research points to something deeper. Certain assumptions, quietly held, that make succession feel harder than it needs to be.
One is the belief that wealth is fragile. That it will not survive being passed on. Another is the fear that wealth itself is somehow dangerous, that children need to be protected from it rather than prepared for it. These assumptions are rarely spoken aloud. But they shape decisions all the same.
The rising generation carries its own version of this, Jaffe explained. A quiet anxiety about proving themselves worthy. Mixed messages about whether to make their own way or wait to be handed the reins. Not knowing where they stand.
What I took from the session is that these mindsets can be reframed. Not ignored, not argued away, but gently challenged and replaced with something more useful. A parent can move from "my children are not ready" to "I have taught them what I know, and I trust what I have given them." A rising generation member can move from "I have to prove I deserve this" to "I have a role to play, and I am learning it."
This is quiet work. It rarely happens in a single conversation. But it is often the real work beneath the paperwork, the trusts, and the structures. Before a family can build a plan together, they usually need to unlearn a few assumptions first.
I think about this often now, in my own conversations with families. The technical side of succession is something I can guide with confidence. The mindsets underneath it takes longer, and they take patience. But they are just as important, if not more so. I am grateful to have spent that morning deepening my expertise from someone who has spent decades understanding exactly why.
